Psychologist Mark Yarhouse lectures on homosexual identity formation and pastoral care
Photo: sexualidentityinstitute.org
'Having same-sex attraction is not in willful disobedience,' Christian psychologist Mark Yarhouse said before an audience of Lee students, faculty, and staff on Tuesday, March 22.
'The person didn't choose this' To talk about [homosexuality] as willful disobedience and to show no compassion is an error on the part of the Church.'
The executive director of the Institution for the Study of Sexual Identity [ISSI] at Regent University spoke in Conn Center Chapel, Lee's largest spiritual speaking venue, and his later presentation and Q&A session was public and open to all members of Lee University.
'It's a huge deal that students were invited to this conversation,' junior Evan Pell said. '[Yarhouse] said a lot of things that people at Lee needed to hear' you know there were people in the audience that had never considered that [homosexuality is not born from willful disobedience] before.'
Yarhouse explained that a 'culture war mindset' regarding this issue is born out of the different lenses people use to view homosexuality.
'The assumption in [faith communities] is 'no one in our community can be gay ' that's out there in the world, but here we're safe',' Yarhouse said. 'Most of us are raised in a culture where gay issues and homosexuality are discussed in the context of the culture wars. And if you're' experiencing same-sex attractions and hear 'gays are an abomination', you quickly learn that there is an us versus them [mentality] and [you] must be a 'them'.'
He proposed that there are three ways to view homosexuality. There is a lens of 'integrity', which preaches that people choose to be gay and are acting out of willful disobedience to God, a 'disability' lens that considers same-sex attraction to be out of an individual's control but homosexual activity to be sinful, and a 'diversity lens' that celebrates homosexual identity and lifestyles.
Yarhouse considers himself to be theologically conservative, and while he uses a 'disability lens' to view the existence of homosexuality, he employs an 'integrity lens' when it comes to the lifestyle choices of sexual minorities, believing same-sex intimacy to be sinful.
Vice President for Student Development Mike Hayes confirmed that Yarhouse's stance on the issue closely aligns with Lee's own policies.
'He holds to a traditional view of marriage,' Hayes said. 'Yarhouse's research also focuses on caring for students who consider themselves a sexual minority on Christian campuses while expecting them to abide by the university's behavioral expectations. His work will continue to help us think about ways to care for our students better.'
Yarhouse said that common milestones of sexual identity formation for gay and lesbian individuals include first awareness of same-sex attraction at puberty, behavior to orgasm during adolescence, private and public self-labeling and disclosure. He clarified however that while many teens in mainstream culture cap their milestones with a same-sex relationship, Christian teens are less likely to express outward displays of their sexuality.
'The average age for Christians who identified as gay as a kind of culture [and] celebrated that identity is 26, and the age of Christians who said no to [homosexual activity] and came to a point where they felt peace about that decision was age 34,' Yarhouse said.
Yarhouse said that during this period of identity formation, Christian sexual minorities look for safe people and places to raise questions and share their experience.
'Even if students are conservative and' will abide by the traditional Christian sexual ethic by not engaging in same-sex sexual behavior, they still have needs for intimacy, and [wonder] how these needs will be met,' Yarhouse said. 'I don't think that the Church has appreciated how we are complicit in creating an atmosphere that makes [it] more likely for [students] to express their [same-sex sexuality] and needs for intimacy in less healthy ways.'
Yarhouse said evangelical circles are prone to be inhospitable to sexual minorities because evangelicals are the group most likely to prescribe to a lens of 'integrity', viewing same-sex attraction itself as sinful. He explained that because of this, gay youth often choose to follow the 'gay script' communicated by the broader LGBT community rather than ask questions of their faith communities.
'That's why many gay people refer to the LGBT community as a family; it's a place that welcomes them and answers questions about identity and community,' Yarhouse said.
Yarhouse said that it's the responsibility of the Church and Christian institutions to better their response to students struggling with sexual identity, and that pastoral care in this area must be improved.
'It's not pastoral care to try [to] make people straight,' Yarhouse said.
This was not the first time the topic of homosexuality has been broached on Lee's campus. In 2006, Lee coined its 'no condemnation, no compromise' stance on homosexuality following a visit from SoulForce, a coalition of gay Christian activists who challenged Christian school policies they viewed as discriminatory.
University president Paul Conn affirmed this mantra and Lee's support of traditional marriage in an interview with the Clarion last fall, responding to the legalization of gay marriage and subsequent controversy within the Council for Christian Colleges and Universities [CCCU] when the organization found its policies on homosexual conduct challenged by two member institutions.
Conn also clarified that Lee does not discriminate based on student identity and will not tolerate homophobia on its campus.
Senior Ashley Akeson said she believes Yarhouse's Chapel service and panel are an important first step in creating a culture of trust and transparency on campus.
'It's great that Lee is intentionally discussing 'hot' issues that have a lot of strong opinions behind them; there's a lot of anger, fear, shame and mistrust behind this issue,' Akeson said. 'I'd like to see Chapel become, in some degree, a place where these conversations are started, and not necessarily a place where beliefs are just reaffirmed.'
Hayes said that Lee will continue the conversation that Yarhouse has started on campus by reviewing current policies related to LGBT issues and hosting faculty and staff development opportunities.
'We ultimately want our students to be prepared to be conversant in the broader public discourse in this area in a way that reflects the compassion of Christ,' Hayes said. 'One of the things our task force talks about consistently is that we do have a responsibility to look at policies but we can never become so focused on the issues that we forget we're dealing with people,' Hayes said.
Yarhouse said that obtaining permission to study gay and lesbian issues at Christian colleges and universities for his research is no easy task.
'It's a lot like 'Mission Impossible',' Yarhouse said of convincing CCCU affiliated universities to cooperate. 'There is a gap between enthusiasm for this [research] and launching a study on your own campus.'
When he first made a pitch for research to the CCCU, 20 member schools agreed to let him conduct his studies on their campuses. The night before the launch of the study, that support had dwindled to only four schools.
'I got a call from a person who was the head of [one of the four] schools and he explained why [he] was going to drop out,' Yarhouse said. 'He told me 'I can't have parents thinking we have gay students at our school'.'
Despite these obstacles, he and his team were able to conduct the study with a sample size of 100 sexual minorities, as well as a second study with 250 sexual minorities. ISSI is currently conducting research that will trace the development of 160 students' sexual identities throughout college and after graduation.
'Most of these [sexual minority] students want to be at those institutions' and be able to navigate their religious identity as Christians and questions that arise about their sexual identity,' Yarhouse said. 'So then the question is, how can the Christian community be a resource for them?'
